My Wings

These are my wings.

To me, they mean I’ve grown and they mean that I’m free.

I got them after it took me three years to realize I was in an unhealthy relationship. After, I realized that most of my relationships were unhealthy. Even the relationships I had with my family. I was angry. I was bitter. I was very unpleasant to be around. Ask Dad. He didn’t even want to be around me.

I didn’t realize it was bad until the end. It honestly didn’t take me long to recover. It was as if a weight had been lifted off of my shoulders. I smiled for the first time in a long time. I laughed until I cried and cried until I laughed. I met up with old friends who welcomed me graciously back into their lives. My family wanted to be around me more. I liked myself.

I didn’t worry so much anymore. I didn’t depend on anyone. I was free. I could breathe.

Does looking at my wings remind me of my ex? No. They remind me of how far I’ve come. How much I’ve grown up. They remind me to let the little things slide and not take everything so personally. They remind me to never be dependent. They remind me that I can do it all on my own if I need to. And I did just that for years. I took a lot of time to find myself and I liked what I found.

But most of all, when Boyfriend runs his finger across the lines so carefully inked into my skin, it reminds me that everything happens for a reason. Every door that closed, every bump in the road, made me exactly who I am today. They made me the woman that he loves. They made me the woman that people like to be around.

My wings mean that I am free to be whoever I want to be.