Friday, February 18, 2011

I'm gonna talk about my underwear

Weeks ago, Dad took me outlet shopping where I found an amazing deal at the Hane’s outlet. I got six pairs of underwear and three pairs of socks for $7.99.


You can’t beat that.

So I get the underwear that were wrapped in a typical underwear package home and opened them up.

They were literally the size of my hand. They looked like my nieces little underwear sans Dora the Explorer and Minnie Mouse.

Boyfriend was in the other room and I started yelling, “Find me the number to Hane’s. I am going to call and complain.”

He asks why as he walked to the bedroom. He takes a look at the underwear which clearly were not my size and starts laughing his ass off.

I didn’t think it was that funny.

“Look, there is no indication at all that these are children’s underwear.” I told him while I held up the label. “There is even a woman on the cover. A full grown woman!”Hanes Perfect Panty Hi Cut Opaque Panties White Size S 4/5 (4 pairs)
Still laughing, Boyfriend was no help so I kicked him out of the bedroom.

I read the cover some more. It said 360 degree stretch. I looked at the underwear, pulled my pants off and put the underwear on.

They fit. Like a glove.

“They actually fit! Now I feel skinny because these tiny things fit me! I am so glad I got six pair, although, they should come with some kind of warning label.” I said running into the living room.

Yesterday, while cleaning off my dresser, I saw a little tag with the Hane’s logo. It said “These will fit you. Try them on.” They should have put that on the front package.

Seriously though…best seven bucks I’ve ever spent. You can’t even tell you are wearing underwear and I have to wear dress pants every day to work and they leave absolutely no panty line.

26 comments:

Amy said...

hahahahaha I totally read this entire post thinking they had Dora and Minnie on them (totally missed the sans)

That's awesome, I love when underwear fits well... I used to buy my underwear from Jacob (don't know if you have them in the states) they had the BEST underwear ever... but then they got all girly and lacy and I got pissed.

Krissy said...

Isn't it awesome when you find undergarments that are just right. Why is that so hard to do?

TalkativeTaurus.com

IWASNTBLOGGEDYESTERDAY said...

I love a bargain..Lucky you.

I don't think we have this brand/type in Asutralia, maybe in sydney but too far away for me :(

Oilfield Trash said...

What is underwear?

J/k congrats on finding some that fit.

steph c said...

Haha awesome.. I'm just glad they actually fit! And I am super intrigued now. I think I need me some Hanes ;)

Danger Boy said...

Hilarious, and you've got to hand it to the people who made that label. It's pretty direct, which is usually not the case.

Not the Hero said...

I was so hoping you were going to phone them. I can just picture the condescending phone jockey on the other end filing her nails... "Did you try them on? No? Perhaps you should. I'll wait" ... " Oh they fit, thanks for calling."

Bubbles said...

I would have freaked out too... but as you said it should have had more of a warning

Jewels said...

hahaha. that is hilarious. I'm so glad they fit. I had a mental picture of you struggling and falling over trapped in the leg of a pair...but it's much better when they actually fit. :-)

Molly Malone said...

Does it say anything about the likelihood of your pets eating them? That's the major problem I have with my own underoos...

Bouncin' Barb said...

That took a twist from what I thought it would be about, hahaha. Good post. Funny and glad you found something that great.

lyndylou said...

Sounds like my kind of underwear! I can just imagine your face though, funny :)

twilightgazing said...

I'm giggling at the thought of you phoning to complain :). What a great bargain and find, maybe time for another shopping trip to get some more.

Gina said...

They really should have put that on the front of the package.

Although, I'm sure they have an automated system that asks "If you think your panties are too small, press one... Try them on first, smartass. Thank you for calling. Goodbye now!"

On My Soapbox said...

No VPL? Hmmm, I might have to try those instead of Hanky Panky underwear.

caterpillar said...

lol...I can't blame your boy friend!

The Onion said...

I am the proud owener of the same brand of drawers, and when I opened them I thought the same thing WHHHHHAAAAAT are these? Seems I remember a lovely descriptor that said, essentially "stop freaking out and try these one. They will fit your bum, promise"

One thing you will notice as you wash them and the printed label fades....no back or front. You can just grab a pair and put them on, back, front....it just doesn't matter! I tried to discern, but finally gave up.

My only complaint, or Special Agent's complaint is that they will stick to pantlegs and then release at the most inopportune times.

Meg O. said...

Life's little surprised like this is makes it so entertaining. Who knew we could have so much fun with underwear?! Loved this post.

hed said...

That's awesome!

I have a visual of me trying them on and stretching them out so much that they fly through the air like a slingshot...

hed hed above water

becca said...

how cool might have to go buy me some

Ms Jenna said...

I'm officially heading out to find this underwear, I want to feel skinny with no panty-lines too!

Chief aka Dad http://unsoundreasoning.blogspot.com said...

Hmmm...my daughter posting about her underwear...as a father, not sure how I'm supposed to feel about that...I'll have to check the handbook :-)

Sandra said...

Hanes totally needs to thank you for this post! I am now wanting a pair of panties that looks three sizes too small but makes my ass feel tighter.
But still, wouldn't they have been even better if they'd had Dora the Explorer on them?

Nicki said...

No panty line? Aaaaaaaannnnnnd I am going shopping.

The Adorkable Ditz said...

I love panties like that. Heehee. Although I don't trust mom with picking up extra underwear for me without me there I like the bikini cut. Last time she did that she got granny panties.

I use them...on that time of the month haha.

The Adorkable Ditz' Missteps

Correa said...

The Adorekable Ditz,
I love that time of the month. It's lovely to want to cry wearing granny panties that time of the month. Which I love of that time of the month, is that I love too see your granny panties high above your waste and you see my boxer briefs high above my waste. Print a tattoo on the upper back of your white granny panties, which I'll love too see.