Friday, July 30, 2010

Facebook is the # 1 cause of conflicts in relationships

Conversation between my boyfriend and I.

Me: I'm mad at you.

BF: Why?

Me: Because I commented on your photo a week ago and you never replied. Your friend commented on it today and within a minute, you replied.

BF: I'm sorry?

Me: I'm never ever going to write anything on your Facebook ever ever again.

BF: Don't do that, baby.

Me: Oh, it's happening! You never write on mine and you never reply.

BF: {Gives me a sad puppy dog face }

Me: Yes, it is very sad.

BF: Wait, I don't know if we are joking or if you are really mad.

Me: I'm kinda mad. Kinda not. It is just Facebook, but that's beside the point.

BF: What's the point?

Me: The point is that when I write I love you on your wall you should at least have the common courtesy to write I love you too.

BF: Okay, I thought this was about a photo comment?

Me: That too.

BF: Baby, I tell you I love you every day and I talk to you all the time in real life. I thought real life was better.

Me: Real life is better, but I don't want to look like a moron that gets ignored by the very boyfriend she brags about all the time.

BF: Okay, I'm sorry, I didn't realize it was a big deal.

Me: {Very defensively} It's not a big deal! It's a small deal.


Me: You know what, let's just pretend this never happened.

BF: It's a little too late for that.

Me: Nah, I have a time machine, just let me erase these last ten minutes.

BF: I will write on your wall more often if that is what you would like.

Me: No! Because now you are just going to do it because I told you to and not because you want to. It's not the same.

BF: Then what do you want?

Me: I want you to get your ass in this time machine so we can erase this whole conversation.

BF: {laughs} Okay, but again I'm sorry. I didn't know it was an issue.

Me: It's not an issue. It would just be nice of you.

BF: Fair enough.

Me: Good. Now shut the hell up and stop complaining about stupid shit.

BF: Me?

Me: Yup.

BF: I'm complaining?

Me: Well, I'm certainly too mature to start an argument about Facebook, so it must have been you.

BF: I see.

Me: {mumbles} I'm a pain in the ass. I will try to do better.

This is pretty much word for word. After my pain in the ass line, he gave me a hug and then I went back to the computer to type this. Facebook, along with ferrets and revolving doors, is evil.

UPDATE: I now have a wall post that says "I love love love love love love love you girlfriend." Haha. I win.


Effy said...

Success! You have trained him well lol

My boyfriend's now learned to make sure he uses the exact same number of o's in "I loooooooooooove you" and number of "so"s in "so so so much", etc as I do because if he uses less I decide to be a child and whine about how he clearly doesn't love me as much as I love him :)

Admin said...

HAHAHA I have GOT to pass that story on to my boyfriend. He will get a kick out of it.

Effy said...

Sometimes I honestly don't know why he continues to date me lmaoooo

amchornetgirl said...

My hubs doesn't have a fb account, so I am spared having to get mad at him for not posting on mine!